The Future

After many cups of coffee, bars of chocolate, glasses of wine, and walks through the park, I have decided I couldn't put writing this blog off any longer. I am leaving Spain. It is time for me to go back to the states and figure something out.

I will continue writing this blog, hopefully more frequently, about my life and my adventures in the work force. For right now, I am unsure, unemployed and the most lost I have ever been. It's the scariest, greatest thing I have ever done in my life. The past few weeks have been filled with many job searches, applications, tears, goodbyes, alcohol, and, of course, Broadway music.

My song list has looked something like this:

1. "What Do You Do With A BA in English/It Sucks To Be Me" - Avenue Q 
2. "I'm the Greatest Star" - Funny Girl - Glee Version (Lea Michele)
3. "I See The Future" - The Fix  
4. "I am Damaged" - Heathers
5. "Sante Fe" - Rent
6. "Confidence" - The Sound of Music
7. "Without You" - Rent
8. "Anything You Can Do" - Annie Get Your Gun
9. "Dentist" - Little Shop of Horrors
10. "Ding Dong! The Wicked Witch Is Dead" - Glee - Barbara Streisand version
11. The entirety of The Book of Mormon soundtrack
12. "I Have Confidence" - The Sound of Music
13. "Til There Was You" - The Music Man - The Beatles version

And the job search will hopefully end with the classic: "Don't Rain On My Parade" - Funny Girl

So, as you can see from that list, it's been quite an emotional roller coaster of a few weeks, ranging from sadness, to optimism, to flat out funny. 

This will probably be the last post I write in Spain.

It has been a great year. In the memory of my first post, I will write my excitements/fears of going back home.

Five Things I Am Excited About:

1) Getting to see my friends and family! This is the longest I have ever been away from them and I miss each and every one of them each and every single day.

2) People smiling at you. I miss making eye contact with people and having them smile at you. People smiling will be a much welcome thing about home.

3) Food. Brussels Sprouts. Good margaritas. Goldfish. Homemade cookies. Chicken and dumplings. Panda Express.

4) Going to my favorite places. Like the theater. And Barnes and Noble.

5) Being in a place where I don't have to worry about leaving. I am legal in the states. And I don't have to have a job just for that. 

Bonus excitement: DRYERS! I hate hanging my clothes.

Five Things I am Nervous About:

1) Not having a job!!! I have never not had a job. I've thought about it. I have had some sort of job since I was 15 and a half. Or at least something lined up. This exciting and scary all at once. Job hunting is tough. This is where Brian's part in "It Sucks to Be Me" from Avenue Q comes in handy...

2) Driving. I don't want to drive. I've been spoiled with all of this walking. It's great to never have to think "I can't have another glass of wine because I have to drive." I am going to miss public transport. And I am not looking forward to the traffic.

3) Moving back in with my parents in my hometown. Thankfully I have the best parents. Even still, this is something that is quite difficult for a 23-year-old. It almost feels like I'm admitting "I can't make it on my own" even though I have been and I know I can and that has nothing to do with why I am moving in with them.

4) American Ignorance. Not that Spaniards are less ignorant, but being a foreigner opens eyes. I don't want to go back and have the damn NorCal conservatives rub off on me....

5) Okay, I know I said this one, but JOBS!!!!!!

Well, I hope you enjoyed this post. Keep reading for my post-grad adventures.